Ill-informed rantings and half-baked theories from someone who should know better.
Wednesday, August 08, 2007
When emotional children take it too far.
Tim: (to Bob Ellis) How do you put up with her? All the sarcasm and ironic banter and yap-yap-yap. It must drive you nuts.
Me: She's a long-suffering dog.
Tim: I don't doubt.
Me: Are you insinuating that I'm perhaps on the incessantly irritating side?
Tim: Only a little.
Me: You realise it's the verbal equivalent of tugging on your pigtails and dipping them in an inkwell? I'm only doing it to get your attention.
Tim: A friend of mine's kid just had her hair burnt off at school by some boy. I figure he must really be in love with her if we're going by the pigtail/inkwell theory.
Me: Burnt? What year are they in?
Tim: Eight.
Me: Jesus christ. With a cigarette lighter?
Tim: I guess so. Presumably it wasn't with a blowtorch.
Me: Was the guy expelled?
Tim: No, he wasn't even suspended. Because - get this - his defence was that he only did it because she had called him an emo. The school let him off.
Me: What? Why?
Tim: Because according to that school, 'emo' is a derogatory term. Along with faggot and nigger and slut and what-not.
Me: THESE LONG-FRINGED MUSIC FANS ARE MAKING A MOCKERY OF US ALL, etc.
***********************
98 days til the next election.
Kudos to you Ms Fits - you're taking your blog back.
ReplyDeleteI'd rather read your regular posts than responses to the sycophantic and insane, any day
When I was a little Marmalade, one of those creatures confronted me at the Melbourne Zoo. I lifted a trembling hand from the dubious safety of my stroller and offered it a biscuit.
ReplyDeleteThe creature cocked its tiny head and stared me down. Then, with one stab of its drainpipe neck, it ducked under my offered biscuit and stole the entire bag. I still remember the glottal delight it issued as it fled with my booty.
I burst into tears. The moral is never, ever, trust emus.
Theres been some discussion within hip hop circles about the use of the word "nigger" esp after the Don Imus affair (he called some black women "hoes" and you simply dont do that if youre face is a pasty colour). Anyway, Im wondering if in fifty years there'll be a similar purge of words like emo from the vocab of the clinically depressed and maladjudsted. Somehow I dont think theres gonna be any lynchings or a song like "Strange Fruit" being written for these zanex consumers. Teenagers need to learn the historical realities just like the rest of us. Stop this moral equivalency now.
ReplyDeleteI love 'Strange Fruit', Nina Simone is a goddess.
ReplyDeleteActually, 'Strange Fruit' was written by Billie Holiday.
ReplyDelete*adopts annoyingly smug look reminiscent of year 12 swot in a private girls school*
Actually it was a poem that was adapted into a song by Meeropol long before Billie holiday performed it.
ReplyDelete*adopts babies*
Besides - Andy pants simply said - 'I love Strange fruit' - 'Nina Simone is a goddess' - nix about who wrote it, so no smugness warranted.
ReplyDeleteWell, I have been put in my place!
ReplyDeleteI really must learn to consult wikipedia before I run my mouth off...
Nina Simone IS a goddess, that much is sure. However, to be pedantic, as two elements with nothing to do with each other whatsoever (given that Billie Holiday is the one most famous for the song) the sentence should have been separated into two, or at least divided by 'and'.
EG "I love 'Strange Fruit' AND Nina Simone is a goddess.
It's a case of grammar really.
But yes, I am very sheepish in my easily disproved bold statements.
*adopts angelina jolie*
I hope anon has a better source than Wikipedia - it's good but it's not perfect. And Audrey - Andy didn't say anything about 'writing' - Nina definitely sang it didn't she? All this in the interests of accuracy - not trying to put anyone 'in their place'.
ReplyDeleteBurning is acceptable as kiddies’ schools today, interesting. Could this emo be blowtorched, then fire hosed, then battered to make sure he is out. Defence, I thought I heard the word slut .Oh well that’s ok then
ReplyDeleteEmo meaning
An entire subculture of people (usually angsty teens) with a fake personality. The concept of Emo is actually a vicious cycle that never ends, to the utter failing of humanity, and it goes something like this:
1. Girls say they like "sensitive guys" (lie)
2. Guy finds out, so he listens to faggy emo music and dresses like a dork so chicks will see that he is sensitive and not afraid to express himself (lie). He dyes his hair black, wraps himself in a stupid looking scarf, develops an eating disorder, and rants about how "nobody understands".
3. Now an emo guy, he meets Emo chick and they start dating, talking about how their well-off suburban lifestyles are terrible and depressing (lie)
4. Emo guy is just too much of a pussy. His penis is too small, he's too depressed to bathe, and has more mood swings than emo chick, and he doesn't even have a menstrual cycle. Emo chick dumps him, saying "It's not you, it's me." (lie) as she drives off with Wayne, the school jock and captain of the football team.
5. Emo guy goes home and cries proceeds to write a weak song and strum a single string on his acoustic guitar. Another emo chick sees how he is so in touch with his feelings, and the cycle continues.
This is the sad truth of the emo lifestyle/music, and now that I look at how pathetic it really is, maybe the emos DO have something to cry about!
When she sees how sensitive and emo I have become, she'll definitely go out with me!
Kr
C
Um. Just wondering: was that post supposed to be funny? At all?
ReplyDeleteYeah, Fits: you are so not funny.
ReplyDelete*glowers through fringe*
I think it was Ms Fits introducing someone to us in her roundabout way.
ReplyDeleteIt's a hatecrime to irritate emos?
ReplyDeleteWell, colour me fuckinguilty.
And the post/reprint at 3:18 is funny. Emos make me respect goths...
An emo walks into a bar...
ReplyDeleteBartender says "Why the long-faced counterculture indulgence?"
How many emoes does it take to change a lightbulb?
All of them. One to change it, the rest to get terribly upset that the old one is no longer in working order.
Why did the emo cross the street?
He was emotionally attached to the chicken.
What's the difference between an emo and a zebra?
Um, a zebra can't use MySpace..
*dodges rotten tomatoes*
Not for free..?
ReplyDeleteI'll contribute a gold coin for you to eat shit and die.
Garland has a point albeit not expressed with much tact or finesse.
ReplyDeleteBlogging tends to resemble a Year 12 chronicle because the vast majority of contributors write at a Year 12 standard. If you're lucky.
The Internet has been mainstream for more than ten years now but people just don't seem to get it. Yes it is easy to be published and read, particularly on the coat tails of bloggers who can write.
It doesn't make it right, people. Exercise some self restraint and refrain from smothering us with your twee comment, turgid prose and pathetic aping of Fits' style.
Stop killing that which you love with your kindly but sub standard missives.
Have you considered just reading this blog?
Fits' posting of the Wankers Club link was surely an allusion, was it not?
First Post. Last Post.
Has anyone else noticed that John Howard's nose has turned blue recently?
ReplyDeleteIs he hitting the piss really hard? Is that part of his next cunning plan?
While I enjoy any and every symptom of howard's decay, I'm not sure he has the personality to seriously get on it. I have a feeling that he lives to be right- the neighbour who would complain if you took fruit from a tree that overhung your garden.
ReplyDeleteRegarding the 'wan'ker';s' (where does the fucking apostrophe go?) post, and the quality of posts in general, I suspect that ms fits found it amusing and thought others might as well- I've been dismissive of comments in the past, but she allows anonymous comment(o)(e)rs, so if people wish to pay a compliment... sobeit.
The procession of po-faced social commentators (anon 9.15pm being the latest) are really fucking tedious.
ReplyDeleteIf they aren't deriding the quality of Fits' posts, they're harping on about the sychophancy and poor literacy of those who come here to amuse themselves and (hopefully) others. No-one is making anybody read this stuff. There is no intellectual or social ideal to which we must conform. So, if you don't like it, kindly fuck off.
I especially don't get those who say that Fits is laughing at all the lapdogs fawning for her attention and praise. So fucking what?
I come here because Fits' posts regularly make me laugh. Many of the comments are amusing too. I know I'm not reading Epicurus, Sun Tzu, Noam Chomsky or Kenneth Galbraith.
OTOH, I rarely read Friday Q&A but a lot of people obviously thoroughly enjoy it. Good luck to them, I'm not going to rant against their fun.
But these polished turds with their superior attitudes are starting to turn me fucking emo.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteI also paticularly love how the 'po-faced' anon pulled out the same criticism of commentors that has oft been thrown about here before - namely, that most people here try to 'ape' Ms Fits' style.
ReplyDeleteNo offence to Ms Fits, but her style is hardly ground breaking. She certainly isn't the first (and I hope she won't be the last) to use delightfully twee witticisms in her writing. Look around at any number of other blogs and you'll see Ms Fits isn't actually the only person in Australia capable of writing. I tire of this assumption that somehow all people who love playing with language and also happen to blog are 'copying' Ms Fits simply because her exposure through other avenues of the media has directed vast quantities of people to her site.
Perhaps if po-faced anonymice read more widely, they might realise that wordsmithery was invented long before RYWHM, or indeed THE INTERNET, and they might be more circumspect when it comes to throwing around ignorant opinions (and dare I say it, employing exactly the kind of sycophantry he/she/they themselves claim to despise).
I read for the comment jousting.
ReplyDelete*adopts same sex parents*
I thought your Big Brother article was shit. You're a fucking idiot, and you are destined to be a 'barren by choice' cunt well into your forties. Fuck You, you tramp stamp covered whore.
ReplyDeleteAnon's comment at 6.17 lends support to the theory that some of Ms Fits' referrals must be coming from a Young Libs blog somewhere.
ReplyDelete"It doesn't make it right, people. Exercise some self restraint and refrain from smothering us with your twee comment, turgid prose and pathetic aping of Fits' style."
ReplyDeletehear hear. Couldn't agree more.
Well, I thought it was funny.
ReplyDeleteThanks to SJ for link.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FJGrgEo1otw
Word verification 'lurzar', yah I am so totally one.
Oh good, the Mental Misogynists are back (at 6:17). Just when we were starting to get a little too big and empowered for our slutty barren boots...
ReplyDelete"barren by choice"
ReplyDeleteAh at last an epiphany, one that explains all, especially the obvious mental illness.
It's not a **young** Liberal, it's Bill Heffernan.